Susan L. Farrell, Author

Self-Empowerment and Equal Partnerships


In talking about self-empowerment, we often focus on ourselves. Our rights. Our responsibilities. Our choices. Our life.

It is necessary to remember, though, that everything that applies to us also applies to everyone else.

This means that if you are in a committed relationship, your partner is just as important as you are. The life he wants is just as important as the life you want. Not more important, but as important.

I think a committed relationship should be an equal partnership. Each person should work equally hard, take on equal responsibility, and give as much support as he or she expects to receive. It is necessary for both people to work together to determine how their life together will meet their individual desires and goals. This might take some negotiating.

The opposite of an equal partnership is a double standard. That is where it is all about one person and about what that person wants.

If you are in a double standard relationship, and it is all about him, can you change things? If not, is it worth staying in the relationship?

If you are in a double standard relationship, and it is all about you, remember that he has the same rights as you do. Including the right to leave you. You might want to make changes before that happens.

An equal partnership is a beautiful relationship. I recommend that you always remember that your partner, and what he wants, is as important as you and what you want. (Unless, of course, there is abuse involved—then seek professional help.)


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